Friday, May 14, 2010

Missing in Action

That's what I am when you look at my Family Photo Albums. 
Was I really there for the Birth of my Children? 
Birthday parties? 
Did I really go on that Family trip to Portugal? 
Did I miss our "once in a Lifetime Disney Vacation" in 2005 and the return to Disney Trip in 2007?
Oh, I was there... but those very few pictures of me have all been deleted or (I'm embarrassed to say) I photo shop them. 
It is sad, sad to think that my kids have very very few pictures of me with them while they were little. 

Growing up I was considered average size. 
I was never active as teen and hated gym class. I didn't play sports and didn't ride my bike or roller blade or anything like that. I was always to worried about getting hit with the ball or getting hurt or making a fool out of myself, so I was more of a spectator. 

This picture was taken December 31st, 1991

I started gaining weight shortly after I met my husband in 1992, back them I weight 115lbs. By the time we got married, 5 years later I was at 135lbs. 
In April of 1999 after coming back from Vacation with my sister and My Girlfriend I had a hard time looking at the pictures, I weight 180lbs. 
I actually stop weighing myself so I'm not quite sure if that was my heaviest.

These pictures were taken a month apart, one in April 1999 while on Vacation and the other at a Wedding in May 1999
I HATE these pictures!! When I look at them I don't see me. I'm not sure who that person is in those pictures. I didn't feel like that. I felt great and confident, I didn't see myself like that.
I'm not sure how I got there, I guess the fact that we were always eating out as newlyweds, going to the movies and weren't very active people helped towards me putting on 45lbs in 2 years!! 
During my 1st Pregnancy I actually lost weight, a combination of eating healthy and walking during my lunch hour to keep active. 
When my daughter was born in February 2000 a very healthy 7lbs11oz, I weight 165lbs.  After having my Son in 2003 I was still at the same weight and content at being there. 

The turning point for me was gearing up for my sisters wedding. 
I remember so clearly going with the Bridesmaids for a dress fitting and the dress my sister loved for us to wear only went up to size 12. WHICH obviously was WAY to small for me, I believe at the time I was a size 14/16. 
I felt awful and insisted we should get the dresses and I would loose the weight for the wedding which was ONLY 2 months away.
The very next day I started the South Beach diet.

 My sisters Bridal Shower July 2007, I photo shop the picture... 

 my sisters Stagette August 2004

 Wedding September 2004
In 2 months I ended up loosing 15lbs on The South Beach diet and fit into the size 12 dress. 
This diet worked for me. I didn't have to count calories, I just watched my portions. I ate whole grains, lean protein and healthy fats. I had no problem following the plan and it never made me feel deprived. Mostly importantly it taught me how to eat. 
August 2006
December 2007
May 2008
August 2009
During the last 6 years I've maintained my weight between 145lbs - 155lbs still following a modified South Beach diet. 
However it was only in 2008 that I joined a Cardio and Conditioning class at the local Rec Center once a week and started to walk on the treadmill 3 times a week. 
I realized that no matter how clean I ate the only way I would see any change in my weight would be to incorporate some form of exercise.
I mostly still follow the South Beach Diet ways - I load my plate with veggies, healthy carbs, lean protein and healthy fats and snack on Fruit during the day.
I have also moved towards eating more whole foods, eliminating processed foods and Chemicals. 
In December 2009 I took up running and it truly has made an incredible impact in my life... this is me now:

Siss & Me and the kids April 2010

to be continued ... 

10 comments: said...

It is so interesting to get the back story after reading your blog for only a while and only "knowing" you as a runner.

You are beautiful and should be very proud of yourself. Like I think I said in another comment on your before and after post, I can tell you feel so much better in the most recent picture. It's a whole different presentation of your self through your smile. Congratulations, and continue being good to yourself!

Marlene said...

Over time, I've tried every diet out there (including SBD) and struggled with my weight all my life. I only learned how to eat reasonably and health-fully (without "diets") when I took up running.

Thanks for sharing your own journey and here;s to healthy, beautiful YOU!

Anne said...

You look awesome! Thanks so much for sharing...keep it up :)

Paige (Two Runners And A Brown Dog) said...

I love this post. Awesome!!!

Her Name is Rio said...

You are a beautiful person and that was evident in all your pictures, despite what the scale says. It is so great to know that you have been able to achieve a healthier weight through all of your hard work!

ajh said...

I waS much heavier at one time too and I actually don' know what my top weight was. I was cleaning at work today and found a school picture of my when I was very heavy. The worst was the expression on my face. I did not look happy. I ended up having gall bladder surgery and it changed my life. I couldn't believe I was having major surgery in my early 40s because of my lifestyle. It was the kick in the pants I needed.

I started exercising immediately. But I walked before I ran. Weight watchers worked for me. I lost around 30 pounds and was happy there for a long time. I have lost up to 20 more but don't keep it all off. I go up but not that much. I will never weigh that again. My doctor considers me a huge success story.

I am glad to be a role model for my kids which wasn't always true.

Doesn't it feel great to have improved in so many ways. I didn't mind turning 50 at all because I was so much better off than when I was 40!

Congratulations! You look so great!

Brittany Ann said...

Your story is so real and true and beautiful. I'm excited to hear more!

Nicole said...

I know it's hard to look at those pictures (I have some too...) but it is so obvious how beautiful you are inside and out! You're family is gorgeous! Thank you for sharing your story with us! :) I can't wait to read the continuation.

freak4fitness said...

What an interesting post with the timeline of your weight-loss journey. You look so happy & healthy in that last pic, what a beautiful family! Keep up the good work, and it's perfectly okay to keep those other pics around.

Laura said...

Such a great post...You should be proud of your journey!